Today jokes
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Why did the monster put the cake in the freezer? Because he had been told to ice it.
1st Monster: What is that son of yours doing these days ? 2nd Monster: He's at medical school. 1st Monster: Oh, what's he studying ? 2nd Monster: Nothing, they're studying him!
First monster: That pretty girl over there just rolled her eyes at me. Second monster: Well you'd better roll them back to her, she might need them.
What do young female monsters do at parties ? They go around looking for edible bachelors !
Why is stupid monster like a jack-o'-lantern? They both have empty heads.
Girl Monster 1: "I hear you've met the perfect guy." Girl Monster 2: "Oh yes, he's a bad dream come true!"
How does a monster begin a fairy tale? "Once upon a slime . . ."
What monster plays the most April Fool's jokes? Prankenstein!
What would you get if you crossed a monster with a Thanksgiving dessert? Bumpkin pie!
Why did the monster get a ticket at Thanksgiving dinner? He was exceeding the feed limit!