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I have discovered the art of deceiving diplomats. I speak the truth, and they never believe me.

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Lie: A very poor substitute for the truth, but the only one discovered to date.

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It is twice as hard to crush a half-truth as a whole lie.

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Any clod can have the facts, but having opinions is an Art.

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Psychoanalysis is confession without absolution.

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A cynic is not merely one who reads bitter lessons from the past, he is one who is prematurely disappointed in the future.

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Vegetarianism is harmless enough, although it is apt to fill a man with wind and self-righteousness.

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To avoid criticism do nothing, say nothing, be nothing.

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It is inexcusable for scientists to torture animals; let them make their experiments on journalists and politicians.

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The human animal differs from the lesser primates in his passion for lists of "Ten Best".

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