Dirty jokes
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Pinnochio had been getting complaints from his girlfriend. "Every time we make love," she said, "I get splinters." So Pinocchio went back to his maker, Gipetto the carpenter, for advice. "Sandpaper," said the carpenter. "That's what you need." So Pinocchio took some sheets of sandpaper and went home. A few weeks later the carpenter bumped into Pinocchio again. "How are you getting on with the girls now?" he asked. "Who needs girls?" said Pinocchio.
Q: What did the leper say to the hooker? A: Keep the tip.
Q. What do you call 1,000 heavily armed lesbians? A. Militia Etheridge
Q: Why did the blonde make love in the microwave? A: She wanted to have a baby in 9 minutes.
Q: Why did the blonde have a hysterectomy? A: She wanted to stop having grandchildren.
Q: What's the ultimate embarrassment for a blonde? A: When her ben-wa balls set off the airport metal detector.
Q: Why do blondes always drink with straws? A: Practice.
Q: Why does a blonde insist on him wearing a condom? A: So she can have a doggie bag for later.
Q: What did the blind blonde say as she was making love with her new boyfriend? A: "Funny, you don't feel Jewish."
Q: What do you call a blonde that can suck a golfball through a water hose? A:Sweetheart!