New jokes
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Why do people leave letters at the football ground ? They want to catch the last goal-post !
What do you call a Welshman who writes lots of letters ? Pen Gwyn !
His girlfriend returned all his letters. I bet she marked them "second class male !"
Where do ghosts mail their letters? At the ghost office.
Who does Dracula get letters from? His fang club.
What letters are not in the alphabet? The ones in the mail, of course!
What two letters do you say when you answer the phone? LO
Losing a wife can be hard. In most cases, it is damned near impossible.
A man is incomplete until he is married. After that, he's finished.
"Well, Mrs. O'Connor, so you want a divorce?" the solicitor questioned his client. "Tell me about it. Do you have a grudge?" "Oh, no," replied Mrs. O'Connor. "Shure now, we have a carport." The solicitor tried again. "Well, does the man beat you up?" "No, no," said Mrs. O'Connor, looking puzzled. "Oi'm always first out of bed." Still hopeful, the solicitor tried once again. "What I'm trying to find out are what grounds you have." "Bless ye, sor. We live in a flat -- not even a window box, let alone grounds." "Mrs. O'Connor," the solicitor said in considerable exasperation, "you need a reason that the court can consider. "What is the reason for you seeking this divorce?" "Ah, well now," said the lady, "Shure it's because the man can't hold an intelligent conversation."
