New jokes
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Computer helpline? Everytime I log onto the seven dwarfs website my computer screen goes snow white....
Customer: I think I've got a bug in my computer. Repairman: Does your computer make a humming noise? Customer: Yes. Repairman: Then it must be a humbug!
Helpline? I've just pushed a piece of bacon into my disk drive! Has the computer stopped working? No, but there's a lot of crackling.
How do you stop your laptop batteries from running out? Hide their trainers.
I've been on my computer all night! Don't you think you'd be more comfortable on a bed like everyone else?
I've been sitting at this computer for hours and I haven't seen a single website. That's because you're supposed to sit facing the screen.
Mum, Mum, Dad's broken my computer! How did he do that? I dropped it on his head.
Pupil: In other schools, pupils get a choice of computers to use. Teacher: You get a choice her, too. Use the one we've got or don't use any at all.
Teacher: Look at the state of the school computer. I want that screen cleaned so I can see my face in it! Pupil: But then it will crack and we won't be able to use it at all.
Teacher: Shall I put the school computer on? Pupil: No, Miss, the dress you're wearing looks fine.