New jokes
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A redhead, a brunette and a blonde all escape from a prison together. They run into the nearby woods and all climb up seperate trees. When the police find the redheads tree and ask who is up there, the redhead chirps like a bird. Then the police go to the brunette's tree. When they ask who is up there, the brunette makes chipmunk noises. Finally, when the police go to the blonde's tree and ask who is up there, the blonde goes,"MOOOOOOOOOO!"
A blonde, a brunette and a redhead are all stuck on a deserted island together. The island is 20 miles from the nearest inhabited island so they all decide to try to swim there. The redhead makes it 10 miles, is exhausted, gives up, and drowns. The brunette makes it 15 miles before she's too tired to go any farther and drowns. The blonde gets 19 miles away from the deserted island, decides she's too tired to go any farther, and swims all the way back to the deserted island.
Q. Why is it good to have a blonde passenger? A. You can park in the handicap zone.
Q. How did the blonde die ice-fishing? A. She was run over by the zambonis machine.
Q. What does a blonde say when you blow in her ear? A. "Thanks for the refill!"
Q. Why do blondes have more fun? A. They are easier to keep amused.
Q. Why did the blonde climb over the glass wall? A. To see what was on the other side.
Q. How do you drown a blonde? A1. Put a mirror at the bottom of the pool. A2. Stick a scratch and sniff sticker at the bottom of the pool.
Q. Why did the blonde get so excited when she finished the jigsaw puzzle after only 6 months? A. Because on the box it said: From 2-4 years.
Q. What did the blonde say when she knocked over a priceless Ming vase? A. "It's okay Daddy, I'm not hurt."