New jokes
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Waiter, I can't eat this meat, it's crawling with maggots ! Quick, run to the other end of the table and grab it as it goes by !
Waiter, what is this cockroach doing on my ice cream sundae ? Skiing sir !
Waiter, there is a fly in my bean soup ! Don't worry sir I'll fish him out and exchange it for a bean !
Waiter, what is this creepy-crawly doing in my salad? Not him again, he's in here every night !
Waiter, what's this bug doing waltzing around my table ! It's the band, sir, they are playing his tune !
Waiter, there is a dead fly in my soup ! No its not, it's a piece of dirt that looks like one !
Waiter, there is a frog in my soup ! Don't worry sir there isn't enough there to drown him !
Waiter, can you get rid of this fly in my starter ! I can't do that sir, he's not had his main course yet !
Sir you haven't touched your custard. I'm just waiting for the fly to stop using it as a trampoline !
"Waiter!" shouted the furious diner, "How dare you serve me this! There's a damn TWIG in my soup!" "My apologies," said the waiter. "I'll inform the branch manager."