New jokes
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Do you like my new baby sister ? The stalk bought her. Hmm, it looks as if the stalk dropped her on her head.
My sister went on a crash diet. Is that why she looks a wreck ?
Why does your sister have yeast and shoe polish for breakfast ? Because she wants to rise and shine.
Doctor, Doctor! my sister thinks she's an elevator. Tell her to come in. I can't. She doesn't stop at this floor.
Alfie was listening to his sister practice her singing. ' Sis,' he said, 'I wish you'd sing Christmas carols.' 'That's nice of you, Alfie,' she replied. 'Why ?' 'Then I'd only have to hear you once a year !'
My sister is so dim she thinks that a cartoon is a song you sing in a car.
Teacher: What's this a picture of ? Class: Don't know, Miss. Teacher: It's a kangaroo. Class: What's a kangaroo, miss ? Teacher: A kangaroo is a native of Australia. Smallest boy: Wow, my sister's married one of them
Why did your sister jump out the window ? Because she wanted to try out her new spring suit
A little demon came home from school one day and said to his mother, 'I hate my sister's guts.' 'All right,' said his mother, 'I won't put them in your sandwiches again.'
Mother: Jared, get your little sister's hat out of that puddle. Jared: I can't mum, she's got it strapped too tight under her chin!