Today jokes
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Doctor Doctor I keep thinking I'm a caterpillar Don't worry you'll soon change !
Doctor, Doctor I keep thinking I'm a snake about to shed it's skin Why don't you go behind the screen and slip into something more comfortable then !
Q: Why do blonde nurses bring red magic markers to work? A: In case they have to draw blood.
What kind of physician works on a cruise liner? A dry doc.
What do you get if you have strep throat on Friday? Saturday Night Fever.
Did you hear about the two podiatrists who opened their offices on the same street? They were arch enemies.
The patient shook his doctor's hand in gratitude and said, "Since we are the best of friends, I would not want to insult you by offering payment. But I would like for you to know that I had mentioned you in my will." "That is very kind of you," said the doctor emotionally, and then added, "May I see that prescription I just gave you? I'd like to make a little change..."
Doctor, doctor, can I have a bottle of aspirin and a pot of glue? Why? Because I've been at my computer all day and I've got a splitting headache!
Doctor, Doctor, my little brother thinks he's a computer. Well bring him in so I can cure him. I can't, I need to use him to finish my homework.
A nurse had to take a patient back to her room after surgery. Woman was still feeling the effects of the anesthetic and was rather confused. After nurse had made her comfortable, she was confronted with four of woman friends who asked, "How is she?" The nurse replied, "Oh, she's quite dopey." One of the friends said, "We know that, but how is she healthwise?"