Today jokes
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Why is the air so clean and healthy on Halloween? Because so many witches are sweeping the sky.
A boy went to a Halloween party with a sheet over his head. "Are you here as a ghost?" asked his friends. "No," he replied, "I'm an unmade bed." Another boy wore a sheet over his head. "Are you an unmade bed?" asked his friends. "No, I'm an undercover agent," he replied.
A Toledo man was admitted to the city hospital last night with severe burns after dunking for French fries at a Halloween party.
One Halloween this woman opens her door to find the most adorable little girl, with golden blond curly hair and the biggest blue eyes. She was dressed as an Angel, and was just delightful. The woman said, "what are you supposed to say sweetheart?" The little girl looks up at the woman and says "Twick or Tweat!" The woman thinks this is just adorable, and she calls her husband to come to the door. The woman say to the child, "Go ahead honey say it just one more time." Once again the little Angel looks up and says, "Twick or Tweat!" The husband agrees with his wife, this little Angel is just the cutest thing. The woman picks an apple from the Treat Bowl, shines it up with her apron, and drops it into the little girl's Treat Bag. The little Angel looks in her bag then looks up at the woman and says, "Thanks a lot lady, you just broke my f**king cookies!"
Q: What do birds give out on Halloween? A: Tweets.
Q: What do little trees say on Halloween? A: Twig or treat.
A boy went to a Halloween party with a sheet over his head. 'Are you here as a ghost ?' asked his friends 'No, I'm an undercover agent".
Why did the boy carry a clock and a bird on Halloween ? It was for 'tick or tweet' !
What happened when the girl dressed as a spoon left the Halloween party ? No one moved. They couldn't stir without her.
What do fishermen say on Halloween? "Trick-or-trout!"