Today jokes
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What kind of star wears sunglasses? A movie star.
What is an Actor? A man who tries to be everything but himself
What sort of animals make the best TV presenters ? Gnus - readers !
What do you call a fight between film actors ? Star wars !
What do you get if you cross a dog and a film studio ? Collie-wood !
Why did Captain Kirk go into the ladies toilet ? To boldly go where no man has been before !
Q: What is the difference between a lawnmower and a soprano sax? A: You can tune the lawnmower and the owner's neighbors don't mind if you don't return the sax when you borrow it.
Q: How many alto sax players does it take to change a light bulb? A: Five. One to handle the bulb, and 4 to contemplate how David Sanborn would've done it.
Q: If you were out in the woods, who would you trust for directions, an in-tune tenor sax player, an out-of-tune tenor sax player, or Santa Claus? A: The out-of-tune sax player! You were hallucinating the other two.
Q: What's the definition of a gentleman? A: One who knows how to play the saxophone, but doesn't!