Today jokes
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Q: What kind of work does a weak cat do? - A: Light mouse work.
Q: What kind of cats lay around the house? - A: Car-pets!
Q: How do cats buy things? - A: From a cat-alogue!
Q: Why did the mother cat put stamps on her kittens? - A: Because she wanted to mail a litter.
Q: What do you call it when a cat stops? - A: A paws!
Q: Why do cats eat fur balls? - A: Because they love a good gag!
Q: What do you call a cat when he first wakes up with the alarm clock? - A: Catsup!
A dog thinks: Hey, these people I live with feed me, love me, provide me with a nice warm, dry house, pet me, and take good care of me... They must be Gods! A cat thinks: Hey, these people I live with feed me, love me, provide me with a nice warm, dry house, pet me, and take good care of me... I must be a God!
Brother: Did you put the cat out ? Sister: Why, is it on fire ?
What looks like half a cat ? The other half !