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There are times when you have to choose between being a human and having good taste.

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Bibo, ergo sum. - I drink, therefore I am

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Cogito ergo spud. - I think, therefore I yam

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It is dangerous to be sincere unless you are also stupid.

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Be a first rate version of yourself, not a second rate version of someone else.

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Most religions do not make men better, only warier.

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A good politician is quite as unthinkable as an honest burglar.

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What a beautiful fix we are in now; peace has been declared.

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Glory is fleeting, but obscurity is forever.

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There is nothing more exhilarating than to be shot at without result.

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