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A good bookshop is just a genteel Black Hole that knows how to read.

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Sham Harga had run a succesful eatery for many years by always smiling, never extending credit, and realizing that most of his customers wanted meals properly balanced between the four food groups: sugar, starch, grease and burnt crunchy bits.

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If you put butter and salt on it, it tastes like salty butter.

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Of course, it is very important to be sober when you take an exam. Many worthwhile careers in the street- cleansing, fruit-picking and subway-guitar-playing industries have been founded on a lack of understanding of this simple fact.

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For animals, the entire universe has been neatly divided into things to (a) mate with, (b) eat, (c) run away from, and (d) rocks.

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One of the universal rules of happiness is: always be wary of any helpful item that weighs less than its operating manual.

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A marriage is always made up of two people who are prepared to swear that only the other one snores.

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All government -- indeed, every human benefit and enjoyment, every virtue and every prudent act -- is founded on compromise and barter.

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When the least they could do to you was everything, then the most they could do to you suddenly held no terror.

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He says gods like to see an atheist around. Gives them something to aim at.

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